Blurred

How could it be? Just a bottle of rum can’t drive me this much insane. I was immaculately drunk and while walking down the street, to my homewards, i lit up a joint, found rolled up in my shirt’s pocket. Without wasting a moment i fetched out a matchbox from the blue jeans i was wearing scribbled and the bottom cloth over feet got stained by mud.

It was a party from my batchmate of college who joined a new i.t company, i was returning from, at night around 2. 00a.m.A night of summer in june, along with full moon and sweat soaking, relievable breeze had some kind of overpowering trick i got trapped by. It was preety refreshing for me, the walk, turning on “mistreated by deep purple” on my mobile phone with earphone plugged it.The truck horns at times were getting into my nerves as they were so loud, that it seemed like it’s penetrating the sound waves through deep purple in my drums,and banging hard.I don’t exactly know when i returned home and fell asleep on my sofa.

Everytime when i get drunk like this, the next morning hits me being savage and embarrassing.I woke up at 7. A. M as usual and snatched the phone out of my jeans, which got a scratch from nowhere, hopefully it fell from my hand. But it was a disaster and a massive heart break hit hard when i called up my saloni, with whom am in a relationship from past 2 years. As per her, i called her up at 1.18 am and started with a normal conversation, though she knew by my voice that i was drunk eventually it may happen that i got angry by some words from her , but does not have any relevance on that, she told me. But i also agreed with her, cause i did not have any idea what happened as i did not remember a thing. The whole fault was mine. I calm myself down, cut the call and sit back, then rationally i went through what she said, and i again agreed with her, because this time i blamed myself, but how can i let this whole thing explain to her. Although why she will be responsible or be harassed for my reason of anger and getting drunk, i still feel guilty and ashamed. But i won’t be able to explain her things cause she won’t pardon me.

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